The False Evangelist

The False Evagelist

July 22, 2002

I dreamed I walked into the middle of a church service. I do not know the building
– it looked more like a school – wood stage. The people from a church I have visited in my past were there.
There was an evangelist speaking. He would call on people and He would tell them
about their past knowledge>. There was no preaching and the atmosphere seemed just a little odd but
nothing too alarming. The oddness was that it felt more like a community meeting than
a church service – The people were

going through the motions but there was no feeling of the Holy One the midst
of the people. Instead it was void of feeling. The manifest present of God was not backing
the signs and wonders. When the Holy Spirit is present and moves I feel like
weeping.
Then an usher came to me and said that everyone who didn't get called out from the
crowd to get in line and everyone would get a "personal prophecy"…I heard later " Dead Bones" .
(here is my opinion inserted here, When we go after signs and wonders with out the pursuit
of greater intimacy with Jesus, We will dry up. That water you are drinking wil keep you
thristing, but if you go after greater intimacy with Jesus, the Holy One, you will have
the living water. I believe that we are also in a way those dead bones (we are a spiritual dead generation), but we
can can be revived with the evelasting water that only a relationship with Jesus brings.)

I looked at the usher and said "Everyone?" "He's going to give everyone a prophecy?"
I felt doubt in my heart because how could that happen with the moving of the
Holy Spirit?

Even though I feel this way, I go and get in line. I am curious as to what the
man will say about me. I notice him and there seems to be snake around him but I think
I am trying to get in line and
I cant.

I hear the evangelist start to speak into the microphone. "There is someone out
there who has been delivered greatly from the enemy, who has been abused and
abandoned and is called to be an apostle…. Come out of the crowd so I can give
you a word…I get excited.

I had been abused, abandoned and God did do a mighty work in my emotions in my
early 20's. But I hesitated. I am not called as an apostle. I am a woman.
I don't speak in crowds. That is not just me.

Even though I am petrified to speak in public. In my dream I
am anxious to get on stage and be "recognized" by the evangelist. I thought to myself.
I will finally be acknowledged by others as being called by God. I will be known
now…. I can't get on stage.
(opinion inserted here, just like going after signs and wonders, having our personal
agendas in front of our relationship with Jesus is wrong. If your action takes off
the focus of Jesus and on to ourselves, it is a slippery slope down... pride, selfishness,
greed, carnality and the list goes on. If anyone of us decides to follow this path,
the end is the same. No one is above this truth.)

Insted of going forward, I suddenly thrust into a deep sleep in the pew where
I am sitting.

I wake up and no one is in the meeting room/sanctuary. It is late afternoon
and people are trickling in to the next meeting; I have the feeling of
"Oh Gosh I missed it!". I am confused.
"for God is not a God of confusion but of peace,
as in all the churches of the saints."
I Cor 14:33
I was trying to get to the front and then I fell asleep.
"But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant
and so lie against the turth. This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but
is earthly, natural demonic. For where jealously and selfish ambition exist, there
is disorder and every evil thing. But the widom from above is first pure, than peaceable,
gentle, reasonable , full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.
And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace."
James 3: 14-18

I see people come in and then I get up and
move from the center of the room to the next to the last pew. The service is starting
again and they are singing songs. A man comes in right behind me. There is a door
behind me to my left. I turn around and it is Jesus in a white robe and blue sash.
No one recognizes Him. I turn around and act like I am "praying" for Him but I just
want to touch Him and I cry. I don't understand why the crowd is not going crazy that
Jesus was in the room. The service continues no notices. When He comes in I am
in a little bubble of anointing. Jesus is looking down. His face is somber. I don't
know or can't remember if He is crying. But it is not a happy face. When I touch Him
I get a visual picture – vision or a beautiful bride running. She has a very nice
gown on. It has a little smudge on it but the significant thing about her is that
she is cut and bleeding, bruised. She is hurt and running.
(opinon here: See the bride is not at her best. Her dress is just a little dirty,
not real noticable, but stille dirty. She is also hurt and needs to be restored. Jesus
is unhappy in my dream to the point of tears taht we are as a body of Chirst not
at our best. We need to change our dirty wedding dress and clean it and we need to
stop running and let the Holy One heal our brusies and bleeding places. We need to stop for a
relationship with Christ. This hurts Jesus when we do not let what He has done
for us work for us. He has achieved it already.

I am crying that Jesus was sitting behind me and that I was in His presence.

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